Sunday, July 20, 2014

Absconded Bees & Arrested Depression

 Running a small sort of farm type home is not always glamorous. Okay, it is never glamorous but I suppose one has romantic notions of a quiet little homestead with cheery chickens clucking happily along, delightful ducks waddling about as you harvest bountiful veggies from your quaint little garden. Where do those ideas come from? Probably flea market paintings. 

 The chickens usually peck my plants to death, squawk loudly, and bully chickens on the low end of the pecking order. The ducks have gone feral trying to protect their pond. I am sure the male duck was trying to drown the dog the other day. Yeh, this ain't no Pollyanna farm and wearing rubber boots ain't for fashion. We got zucchini by the truckloads though. 

Organic Zucchini
 Sadly, our adventure in beekeeping has ended for this year. After the colony lost their first queen, I quickly ordered another but the colony was weak. They did accept the new queen but wild bees started robbing the hive. Two days after moving the hive, the wild bees started robbing it more aggressively, this time killing the new queen. Wasps even got in on the action. After a week, they had won. Without the queen, no honey, and very few workers it was doomed. The lesson we learned is start with more than one hive. Poor bees.

 Along the lines of failing, I have a confession that is ironic since it comes after a post about not complaining. It is completely unpleasant but I am going to confess it because some believers think no one else struggles like they do and they try to hide issues. So, just so you know, some of us are super foolish in our discouragement but there is always hope.

 On Sunday last week, I was depressed. Really depressed. On the verge of tears, I dressed for church then I prayed but not a good prayer mind you; a desperate, wallowing one. It felt like everything was failing...oh yes, I went there. I begged and specifically asked, "God, will you just take me out of this world?" Then I put on my fake I'm-okay-face and went to church. 

Depressed In Paris....
 During the hour of sitting in the pew, God answered me from the pulpit and I snuffled and sobbed the whole time. At the end, I quickly packed my stuff so as to slide out the door but a friend popped into the seat next to me. When she saw my face, which probably looked like a rendition of Tammy Faye, she said, "Oh...I'm sorry. You probably wanted to get out of here quick.That was a good sermon." Sigh. She had no idea.

  Ephesians 6:12-13 really did a number reminding me that this world is not all there is affecting us. We are to be set on the eternal, not the temporal. We are to be set in the armor of God and resisting the enemy. 

 Oh, thank you pastor for expositing those verses and bringing to my mind the knowledge that my struggle is not against people or things in this world. Thank you for imploring me to ask myself if the spiritual world is seeing the manifold wisdom of God. My depression ceased right there and the day was much more focused on exalting Christ. 

  May Ephesians 6:12-13 ground you if you are feeling hopeless:
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in highplacesWherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand."

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