One area that I think non-followers, and even a lot of followers, like to throw around in anger and hurt with God is that He doesn't answer them in a way they want. He doesn't remove the pain. He doesn't fix the difficult situation. He doesn't heal. Ultimately, God has answered with a "no."
God has every right to say no or yes. That right is part of His sovereignty. Why He answers the way He does is from His holiness and righteousness. If we continue to cultivate anger because of His answer, we must think we have something in us that trumps His sovereignty, holiness, and righteousness. Seems ridiculous.
Sometimes I find myself upset that God has said no to me but then I realize that He is on the other side of the situation. He sees the big picture and therefore the purpose of why things are happening and it is for His glory.
Wouldn't it be great if I could just keep that in my mind? But, nooooo.
Today I woke up whining to God that I was tired and hurt and not sure I could keep going. It had been a hard week of doctor appointments, disagreements, and court that turned ugly and next week, if God sees fit to keep me here, promises more of the same. So, I stood in the bathroom in my jammies, uncombed hair, un-brushed teeth arguing with God why I should not be where I am. Pure ugly.
Graciously, God reminded me that sometimes His no is momentary. Where we are now is not where we will be when we die. What is happening right now will end and we will have something so much better when He takes us to the place He has prepared for us. That's a promise if we are in Christ.
We do not need to whine or keep asking. He removes death, He wipes away the tears, He takes away reproach. It just may not be today or tomorrow.
Friday, December 11, 2015
Monday, December 7, 2015
I Haven't Gotten What I Deserve
You heard me. All these years and after all I have done, I have not gotten anything even close to what I deserve. I could stamp my foot or throw a fit and demand my right to what I am owed...
...but that would be foolish. And it is not just because it is childish of me but it would be ridiculous. Nowadays it is a commonplace attitude that people walk around with a sense of entitlement thinking they deserve something.
What have any of us done or what do any of us deserve? We definitely do deserve something.
I am glad, no, thankful that I have not even gotten close to what I deserve.
Growing up was hard and anger ate at me because life seemed unfair and I was right. It was unfair but not in the way I imagined.
When a righteous, holy and just God looks at the world and does not completely wipe it out, none of us have gotten what we deserve. When He allows us to live and breathe and have family, He exacts an abundant amount of mercy. It is sort of like a convicted killer sentenced to death and he is not put in jail. Not only is he not put in jail but he is given the freedom to walk around and choose to continue doing what he was doing.
Shaking my fist at God as a teenager and saying that I hate Him was more than enough to deserve His wrath but when I set out to actively pursue anything that He defined as sin, I was knowingly seeking His punishment. But God did not destroy me and not only did He not give me what I deserve, He worked in my life to save me. How many of us would pursue the murderer of someone we love and make them part of our family? It is kind of what God did but on a much larger scale because this criminal continued and, even still today, continues to commit crimes of sin. Instead of reaping the wrath of God that I am clearly owed, He made me His own. He cleaned me up, He gave me new life and purpose.
On top of that, I see that He has given me an amazing group of brothers and sisters in Christ. It is a family that is ever growing and so beneficial to my spiritual growth. He has given me opportunities to love others and resources to use when that love needs to be displayed in a provisional way. He has given me eyes to see that people, no matter their color or culture, are His creation made in His image with a soul.
That last one is important because although God has withheld doling out justice, it is coming. For now, we can choose to live however we like (earthly consequences and all) but a time is coming that we will reap what we deserve unless we stand redeemed in Christ. This is mind-boggling. God will not punish one in Christ no matter because God the Son took the punishment on Himself??? It's true.
"Yes God, I am a murderer, a liar, a thief, and more but Christ has taken my penalty and I am free." There is not one single thing I need to do except turn to Christ and even that is a work that God does. My brain still has a hard time wrapping itself around why God would do that but I most certainly want to make sure other souls know that He did and that they have a chance to not get what they deserve.
This is why Christians celebrate Christmas. Jesus, Lord and Savior, operates according to His plan of love, grace, and obedience. Soooo...why did we invent the idea of Santa who operates according to our works???? I'll pass, not getting what I deserve is much better.
...but that would be foolish. And it is not just because it is childish of me but it would be ridiculous. Nowadays it is a commonplace attitude that people walk around with a sense of entitlement thinking they deserve something.
What have any of us done or what do any of us deserve? We definitely do deserve something.
I am glad, no, thankful that I have not even gotten close to what I deserve.
Growing up was hard and anger ate at me because life seemed unfair and I was right. It was unfair but not in the way I imagined.
When a righteous, holy and just God looks at the world and does not completely wipe it out, none of us have gotten what we deserve. When He allows us to live and breathe and have family, He exacts an abundant amount of mercy. It is sort of like a convicted killer sentenced to death and he is not put in jail. Not only is he not put in jail but he is given the freedom to walk around and choose to continue doing what he was doing.
Shaking my fist at God as a teenager and saying that I hate Him was more than enough to deserve His wrath but when I set out to actively pursue anything that He defined as sin, I was knowingly seeking His punishment. But God did not destroy me and not only did He not give me what I deserve, He worked in my life to save me. How many of us would pursue the murderer of someone we love and make them part of our family? It is kind of what God did but on a much larger scale because this criminal continued and, even still today, continues to commit crimes of sin. Instead of reaping the wrath of God that I am clearly owed, He made me His own. He cleaned me up, He gave me new life and purpose.
On top of that, I see that He has given me an amazing group of brothers and sisters in Christ. It is a family that is ever growing and so beneficial to my spiritual growth. He has given me opportunities to love others and resources to use when that love needs to be displayed in a provisional way. He has given me eyes to see that people, no matter their color or culture, are His creation made in His image with a soul.
That last one is important because although God has withheld doling out justice, it is coming. For now, we can choose to live however we like (earthly consequences and all) but a time is coming that we will reap what we deserve unless we stand redeemed in Christ. This is mind-boggling. God will not punish one in Christ no matter because God the Son took the punishment on Himself??? It's true.
"Yes God, I am a murderer, a liar, a thief, and more but Christ has taken my penalty and I am free." There is not one single thing I need to do except turn to Christ and even that is a work that God does. My brain still has a hard time wrapping itself around why God would do that but I most certainly want to make sure other souls know that He did and that they have a chance to not get what they deserve.
This is why Christians celebrate Christmas. Jesus, Lord and Savior, operates according to His plan of love, grace, and obedience. Soooo...why did we invent the idea of Santa who operates according to our works???? I'll pass, not getting what I deserve is much better.
Thursday, November 19, 2015
A Strategy for All Situations Except Food Stains
Of all the things in all the world, I would never say that I was a mentor or a guide or a leader. I hide and I cry. It's what I do. Of all the things in all the world that I would love to be it is a Titus 2 older woman teaching women about godly women things. I am passionately passionate about it but have yet to attain that goal. This is why it throws me off when another woman says something like, "Give me a strategy for getting through this situation." My face surely displays a look of "Who me!?"
Is it the silver highlights that are starting to grace my head or the hands that look like they belong to my grandmother that has fooled them? Something has made them take leave of their senses because they are talking to the woman who left the house with a toothpaste stain on her shirt and possibly forgot to brush the back of her hair (I am still trying to remember if I did, it's a terrible tangle). But, there it was a woman who looked tired and worried asking sincerely for wisdom and wanting to know how I got through situations like her own.
This is why I think discipleship is important. No, it's not because I have so much to share. It is because it puts my feet to the fire and it makes me accountable to how I live out my days. Am I walking the walk that I'm talking or am I all hot air?
In this situation, it may be that my walk and talk aligned in faith. It was a moment where I got alone and just poured out my heart to God then I was quiet and still and I listened to God and His Word rang out. He reminded me of His sovereignty, that He has given me my being, that He has gone before, and that He is and was and will be. For any situation, a good strategy is to remember that God is in every moment at every moment. He is at the beginning of an issue, in the middle and already at the end. If He put me there then He'll be there on the other side of it. Do I trust that? Do I trust that He is good and holy? Do I or does it just sound good to say?
Part of the strategy is to walk through the doubt and come out to the end of it so that you can confess it and move forward. There must be a sorting out of feelings so that they do not wrongly influence our perceptions and we can see Truth unclouded.
It is not for His pleasure that we have sorrow or trouble but it does bring Him pleasure when we grow from adversity. The other part of the strategy after you have walked through the doubt and sorted out emotions is to get some solid sisters to ground you in Truth and pray for you. This is where it would be great to have that older woman in your life being all Titus 2.
For one brief moment, I thought I may have been close but then I spilled cole slaw all down into my cardigan and all over the baby. It might be a little longer before I am there.
Is it the silver highlights that are starting to grace my head or the hands that look like they belong to my grandmother that has fooled them? Something has made them take leave of their senses because they are talking to the woman who left the house with a toothpaste stain on her shirt and possibly forgot to brush the back of her hair (I am still trying to remember if I did, it's a terrible tangle). But, there it was a woman who looked tired and worried asking sincerely for wisdom and wanting to know how I got through situations like her own.
This is why I think discipleship is important. No, it's not because I have so much to share. It is because it puts my feet to the fire and it makes me accountable to how I live out my days. Am I walking the walk that I'm talking or am I all hot air?
In this situation, it may be that my walk and talk aligned in faith. It was a moment where I got alone and just poured out my heart to God then I was quiet and still and I listened to God and His Word rang out. He reminded me of His sovereignty, that He has given me my being, that He has gone before, and that He is and was and will be. For any situation, a good strategy is to remember that God is in every moment at every moment. He is at the beginning of an issue, in the middle and already at the end. If He put me there then He'll be there on the other side of it. Do I trust that? Do I trust that He is good and holy? Do I or does it just sound good to say?
Part of the strategy is to walk through the doubt and come out to the end of it so that you can confess it and move forward. There must be a sorting out of feelings so that they do not wrongly influence our perceptions and we can see Truth unclouded.
It is not for His pleasure that we have sorrow or trouble but it does bring Him pleasure when we grow from adversity. The other part of the strategy after you have walked through the doubt and sorted out emotions is to get some solid sisters to ground you in Truth and pray for you. This is where it would be great to have that older woman in your life being all Titus 2.
For one brief moment, I thought I may have been close but then I spilled cole slaw all down into my cardigan and all over the baby. It might be a little longer before I am there.
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