I Eat My Vinegar with a Spoon

 Uh yeh...you heard me. A big glob of vinegar on a real big spoon, straight shot.

 Vinegar is something I take for a lot of reasons but it is a cringe-worthy event. This past week was a lot like taking vinegar - it had some benefits but it was hard to swallow.

 Jellybean's medical test results were surprisingly discouraging. When the doctor came in, I was smiling, prepared to hear, "Everything looks good." Nope. Instead I heard, "More intervention is required." I think I needed a hit of O2 at that moment. Another surgery????

 Today we saw the ENT and she is very hesitant to take the other doctor's recommendation. She feels the risk of complications is too high. So we are scheduled for surgery before Thanksgiving and we will see what has to happen once she takes a look around. One more surgery no matter which direction she decides to go. My heart aches even though I know something has to be done.

 And ending that week, our oldest dog died. A lot of times, I get up first in the morning but on this particular morning I was sleeping extremely sound so the hubby got up first. The routine is always start coffee, let dogs out, open chicken coop, then let pig out and dogs in to eat. On this brisk day when my husband opened the laundry room door, our old dog lay snuggled on his blanket instead of getting up and he continued to lay there after several attempts to call him. The hubby scooped him up and carried him outside where I would not see him.

 Once I drug myself out of bed, my mind realized that it was terribly quiet in the house and that no dogs were inside. I kept thinking that maybe the hubby had taken the old dog out back with him for some reason, even though he never did  that because the old dog just could not walk that far. 

 It is funny how my mind will allow me to be happily unaware that something could be wrong. I naively sat drinking a cup of coffee until my hubby came walking up from the back with a troubled look on his face. That is when I cried. 

 So maybe you are wondering what the benefit was in that week. Well...God is infinitely wise and merciful and some  benefits are not noticeable right away but I can say that in spite of it all, I managed to help out a friend (just being able to be useful to someone is a big deal for me right now) and Jellybean's current issues have caused DCS to finally decide that he is officially "medically fragile" which means that for anyone to get custody of him, they will have to prove themselves to be sufficiently competent. Of  course, I would much rather prefer him to be healthy but since he has so many issues, I am glad that some measure of insurance is in place to ensure that he will be cared for properly should he be moved from our home. On that note, at the end of last week we celebrated one year with Jellybean. Oh yea!

 If God deems that vinegar must be part of my days then I will take it and trust that He is in control and knows what is best. Hopefully, I will not cringe in the process. God is good all the time - sometimes we just need to be reminded because we are not.