Don't you hate when you are going about your day all willy-nilly and then, BAM, you are at the hospital for a lengthy stay? My sweet little chunky baby failed his swallow test and may be getting a feeding tube so here we are waiting, praying for speedy test results, and seeking to have an abundance of grace for interacting with the many people that will be in and out of our lives during this stay.
I have had opportunities to talk about God's grace and I have had opportunities where it has been shown to me. Exhaustion is not something I do well with and so my emotions are in high gear. Yes, I did almost cry because of a bowel movement, or, better put, lack thereof, so I am teetering on the fringe of ridiculousness.Truly a Godly support system is awesome.
When you get to the fork in the road and cannot determine which way is best, your brothers and sisters can step in and intervene on your behalf and inject Godly wisdom into the situation.
When you hit the speed bump that causes life to slow to a crawl, your family in Christ can walk beside you and fill you with overflowing grace and Truth.
God has been so gracious to me in this area and walking in difficult times is a lot easier when you have someone continuing to keep you focused on Truth and encouraged in the Word. Paul does it all throughout his letters and he asks the churches to do it for him.
Clearly, we cannot be self-reliant. Honestly, we can't be "self" anything in Christ. You are either all in Christ, dead to self or not. Which is it?
Day 3 of our hospital stay and quickly I am being physically worn. This is a very obvious sign that I need to be on guard for "flesh" flare-ups. Thinking that I can take everything on and forgetting God is a quick way to end up spiritually dry. It is imperative to be in the Word. One reason to be thankful for today's super technology is that you have access to God's Word, preaching, and worship music instantly at your fingertips but when you are in the middle of the storm and tumult, you need to have it in your heart and mind.
And then when your willy-nilly becomes turbulent and troublesome, you are better equipped for the ride no matter the outcome. So, maybe I will cry over digestion and maybe I won't but the key here is did I honor the Lord. Maybe we will be dealing with pneumonia, maybe we won't. Maybe we will end up with a more complicated surgery for a feeding tube, maybe we won't. Either way God is not in the business of handling our lives willy-nilly. There is order and purpose and plan and we can trust Him fully to carry our burdens.
So, I place my little Jelly Bean in His Hands and I remind myself that I am not made to bear the load AND THEN I rest.